Ambrose Bierce

Bride: A woman with a fine prospect of happiness behind her…

Lawsuit: A machine which you go into as a pig and come out of as…

The small part of ignorance that we arrange and classify we give the name of…

Alliance – in international politics, the union of two thieves who have their hands so deeply…

Marriage, n: the state or condition of a community consisting of a master, a mistress…

The gambling known as business looks with austere disfavor upon the business known as gambling…

Eulogy. Praise of a person who has either the advantages of wealth and power, or…

Ocean: A body of water occupying about two-thirds of a world made for man…

Beauty, n: the power by which a woman charms a lover and terrifies a husband…

Politics: A strife of interests masquerading as a contest of principles. The conduct of public…

Eloquence, n. The art of orally persuading fools that white is the color that it…

To be positive is to be mistaken at the top of one’s voice…

Death is not the end. There remains the litigation over the estate…

Irreligion – the principal one of the great faiths of the world…

Inventor: A person who makes an ingenious arrangement of wheels, levers and springs, and believes…